What are the top unhappy Marriage signs? What causes unhappiness in a marriage and what to do with it? It is possible to be happy in an unhappy marriage? How do you know if your marriage is worth saving?
Today I intend to give you some answers to these questions. By reading through this detailed article, you will understand the roots of problems in marriage. Moreover, as a take-away, I will propose to you some directions, possible solutions, and an amazing book to read to make your marriage better. Are you ready?
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The nature of marriage
Marriage is a beautiful relationship; it makes you responsible and joyful. It gives you new connections and entwined happiness as well. Well, this is the ideal situation in marriage. In contrast, sometimes things go wrong, and you end up in an unhappy situation. So there is nothing wrong with feeling sad in a marriage.
Ups and downs are all part of the relationships. But, when you step into a phase of a challenging season in a marriage, it will be difficult for you to be happy in the same. From the honeymoon period till disagreements, marriage is an emotional journey that has many colors in it. As a result, most people find it harder to sustain the relationship and carry on. But, still, it is worth the investment.
“Staying in a seriously unhappy marriage can have long-term effects on our mental and emotional health.”
Mike Daniel
An Unhappy Marriage
An unhappy marriage is when couples are struggling to be happy with each other. In simple words, if any of the team is not feeling comfortable doing anything in marriage, divorce would be on the table any minute. It means you are in an unhappy relationship.
There are many reasons related to the topic but let me share the most common one:
- Couples lose interest in each other;
- Couples do not trust each other or break the trust at some point in time;
- Financial Issues;
- Trying to have kids but not succeeding;
- Monotonous Routine;
- Sexual encounters are boring or non-exist at all;
- Lack of understanding;
- Partners are not on the same page regarding home chores;
- Couples do not enjoy each other’s company;
- Communication gap;
- No cute fights;
- Both or one of the partner is ignoring the other on purpose;
- Intimacy, feelings are long gone.
What causes unhappiness in a marriage?
Remember that all your emotions are important and valid in this process of finding out the causes of an unhappy marriage. First, try to find out what’s missing in your life and marriage. Then, for the best results (If you are trying to fix the relationships), write down the main culprits playing the root cause of the sadness in your marriage, such as:
- Physical abuse;
- Emotional abuse;
- Poor communication;
- Money;
- Infidelity;
- Jealousy;
- Fighting;
- Intimacy;
- Lack of commitment.
Every relationship is characterized by some feelings some of them are like:
- Happiness;
- Surprise;
- Sadness;
- Anger;
- Fear;
- Disinterested.
When you are in an unhappy marriage, you’re apparently feeling the emotion of grief and sorrow to some extent. These emotions are powerful signals of information. They give you warnings in case of the negative impact of the marriage. So the top unhappy marriage signs are basically these emotions that provide constant reminders to back off or make things right to be at peace in the end.
Is it normal to be unhappy in marriage?
It is absolutely normal to be in an unhappy marriage, but what is not normal? To be constantly grieving on the tragedy instead of trying to fix it. Marriages encounter the occasional rough patch over the years.
Long or short, there is a time when partners face numerous unsaid problems that gradually make them unhappy, sad, and disinterested in each other. It is pretty normal. But if you really want to keep the relationship and care about your partner, make sure you do your best to save it.
What are the top unhappy marriage SIGNS?
- The sexless married life. The most giant sign of an unhappy marriage is practically missing sex life. You do not enjoy sex with your spouse and do not feel good about your shared sex life;
- It feels physically cold, awkward, and uncomfortable to be together. It is a real struggle to survive a marriage when both of You lack physical touch and intimacy. Sometimes couples are reluctant to even hug or shake hands;
- While talking, you can see that you or your partner started crossing arms, listening absentmindedly, and staring away. Usually, the conversation turns into heated arguments due to a defensive and dominating approach;
- Feeling of disdain toward each other. Unpleasant encounters with spouse due to feelings of loathing and resentment;
- Unreadiness to fix or renew your relationship with the partner. It essentially involves someone shutting down, walking away, or surrendering the argument during the conflict;
- Couples lack understanding, empathy, and compassion, due to which they begin to doubt each other’s loyalty. They blame each other, judge each other, and embarrass each other not only while they are alone but also in front of friends, family, and the public;
- You do not feel motivated while spending time together. As a result, you make separate plans to avoid each other as much as possible;
- You fantasize about leaving your partner or being single again;
- Criticism is somewhat good in a relationship if it’s constructive. Still, in a marriage that is falling apart, criticism becomes a constant habit of couples. Due to this, feelings of love and affection vanish. The couple starts equaling the score by nastier criticism next time to hurt more;
- You try to spend time together but then regret it;
- You believe in being more yourself when departed;
- The defensive mode is always on, and the simple questions seem like judgments or blame, which end up in backlash;
- The seriousness of a broken relationship can be anticipated by the level of argument too. You do not argue anymore. Because it does not make any difference what your partner is doing now. It does not bother you if the other half is not talking or saying something you don’t like, but you don’t have anything to say;
- Not arguing means the two of you are not willing to work through anymore;
- If you don’t accept it, it’s going to be very tough to recover your relationship. Accepting that you’re in an unhappy marriage can be very challenging.
What to do when you are unhappy in your marriage?
Once it is declared that you are feeling bad in a marriage, it is your call now. What do you want? What does your partner want? Do you want to live with each other or not? There may be two conditions:
- Both of you may get convinced that the marriage is over and mutually you should be separated;
- Both of you, or at least one, are ready to fix the issue and accept that the marriage is worth saving.
Take your time to think, and then you should sit together for a conversation and make a strategy to save your relationship. The following book is a guide to follow if you wish to get back to the happiness of your married life:
Avoid Divortory Compilation How To Save A Marriage & Make It Better Than Ever! : How To Fix A Broken Marriage Alone – by Arturo Harkavy
If you are desperate to stop your divorce and stop your spouse from leaving you, then pick this book and read it because these anonymous stories might save your marriage and your relationship!
What to do when your spouse says they are unhappy?
- The moment you realize that you are experiencing unhappiness is the time to get it resolved and start talking to your spouse about it. Try to be more supportive and knowledgeable about his or her ambitions. The best thing you can do is avoid anything that reduces the commitment to each other and show them that you still love them;
- At times you may realize that so many issues, whether household chores, family responsibilities, money, or even child care, have cropped up, causing uneasiness in your marriage;
- Create reasons for engagement with your partner daily. Talk out the things affecting your marriage badly, and remind them that they are essential in your life. If it feels awkward to talk face-to-face, you can use indirect communication methods like calling or texting them. There are many things that you can share to make them happy, so do try.
- Forgiveness has a primary role in bringing happiness back to your married life. Learn to forgive each other and try to forget the wrong done to you. No judgments! Because the failures can be from either side. Give leverage, and then you can expect to get some. You will feel weights off from your shoulder;
- Talking to a professional can help uncover the root cause of your unhappiness and give you many ideas on fixing it.
Final thoughts
Marriage can be more challenging than you first thought, and making it work requires care, time, and patience. So when you were not experiencing the happiness you had when you were dating or married, just know there is a problem. To discover your problems, you should recall when things started to become odd in your relationship.
That’s all from my side. I hope, this brief summary helps you find your way back or forward.
What about you? Would you add something to this? What are the top unhappy marriage signs for you? Go ahead and share your experience if you have successfully rescued your marriage, or you are on the way of make it better. It might help others as well.
